God helps all of us to change and become closer to him. Those who believe in His word are given "light" on something in their lives that needs changed... put off or put on. Following this "dawning awareness" comes the His work in producing a conviction that we must change. We then make a decision to change, relying on God's power, He grants us powerful grace and then it is our job to keep walking obediently in his path. This is how we walk in His Light.
But what can you do when you see areas in your life out of God's will? Is this light from God too bright to walk in, or too overwhelming? Perhaps it all seems just too distant. Biblical disciplines may help very little, only making us admit that we're not up to these changes and living according to them. Growing on them further we only seem to discover other areas where we fall short. In time we might want to give up and let it all go.
If you are feeling overwhelmed by the light, these thoughts may be just what you need to hear:
Don't Forget the Evil One.
Contrary to what we might think, the devil hangs around people close to God a lot. He is always looking for a way to keep us from stepping forward in the new light God grants. His first ploy is to get us to forget the light. If Satan can divert our attention from the truth for a few days, or maybe a week or two, He snatches away the truth before it finds root and conviction begins to grow (Matthew 13).
We are the Devil's greatest ally in this strategy. We are so busy, scurrying here and there, trying to keep all the loose ends of our lives from falling apart, that we give truth little time to root and grow. Most Christians spend most of their lives at the "dawning awareness" stage of spiritual growth, hearing truth they should obey then quickly forgetting it only to hear another truth which is also soon forgotten. Sunday school wouldn't help in this matter. We study a spiritual discipline, attitude or behavior this week, then rapidly move on to another the next week with little attention given to actually implementing change. Light piles up week after week with little opportunity to change. And preachers might not help either. They seldom stick with a topic long enough to allow listeners to assimilate permanent change in their lives. Week by week there are new topics, recommending new attributes or habits listeners "ought" to have. Then before there is a chance to change, they scurry on to the next topic. Many Christians simply get into the forgetting habit. New light seems to come our way constantly. It pricks our consciences a bit when we first hear it. But taking little time to ponder it, and even less time for prayer or introspection, it soon dims and disappears. By Tuesday, the Enemy has snatched Sunday's truth right away. Forgetting may seem like a solution to the bright-light problem. Simply forget the light and it will gradually fade. But this dangerous route produces an infantile faith. The light-conviction-obedience-change-light cycle is your only hope of spiritual maturity. Short-circuiting this process by quickly forgetting light produces a life "stuck" in its progress. Millions of people who have heard God's word have sadly become hardened to His truth. They forget the light soon after leaving their local church, or finishing a new book. Some only gather every week to take a "light shower," but the light is really not considered seriously. These become hearers only and not doers of the word. So if your light is brighter than your life, don't run from the light -- it is your hope for growth. Don't dismiss the light in the hustle of life -- it is your stability. And by all means don't forget the light -- it is your route to spiritual growth.Don't Give Up
If the Evil One can't get us to forget the light, he turns to his back-up plan -- using it to discourage us. He is constantly searching for a way to turn good into evil. When he watches us gain great new insights and read and hear more about God's standards of holiness, he plots a way to twist the good toward evil. His most useful scheme is to suggest to us that this light simply shows what horrible people we really are now. Just as the God's Spirit has access to our minds, Satan can also introduce ideas into our thoughts:
"See... if you were really a good person before God, if you were meant for all this light and grace, you'd be doing all these things already. You would have been doing them a long time ago." he says. Except he seldom speaks in a third person voice. That would be too easy to spot. Rather he introduces thoughts to our minds in the first person: "If I were really a good person, I'd be doing all these things..." It's as if we're talking to ourselves.
Don't pretend
If the devil fails to get us to forget the truth, then fails at getting us to give up, he has a reserve maneuver in his bag of tricks -- inducing us to pretend obedience. Of all the Devil's devices this is his most devastating. Rather than go through all this tedious growth process, simply pretend you already obey this light. It's the busy person's ultimate answer to spiritual growth. Simply act like these truths are something you long ago came to practice. Discuss these disciplines in a Sunday School class like you've practiced them for ages. Nod knowingly as the pastor preaches on things you've never even tried. Wag your head sternly when some sin is being discussed -- as if you've never even been tempted in this area. Instant spirituality! Or at least others think so... and, after all, isn't that what's most important -- what others think? We get all this by simply pretending that our lives are already way up there with all this light. Whole congregations have opted for pretend holiness. No one ever admits to any sin or even temptation. All the testimonies report victory and triumph. Everybody seems perfect here. What a wonderful congregation! Pretend holiness. What a brilliant solution! Or is it? What does it produce? It makes us hypocrites. We have to live with ourselves -- and we know our holiness is counterfeit. And the people closest to you know, too. Whole generations of children have been lost to the Kingdom because they saw through their parent's phony holiness. You might be able to fool some of the people some of the time, but you can't fool all of the people all of the time. Sooner of later they'll see this spiritual fraud. And we can seldom fool oursleves. We know down deep inside what we really are, and we'll despise ourselves for this deception. And we can never fool God. He sees straight into our heart. He knows the real you. His son spent hours condemning the Pharisees for this very sin-- spiritual hypocrisy. So if your light is brighter than your life, don't pretend holiness as a solution. Don't masquerade as an obedient person if you're not. God despised the prayer of the man who gave thanks for his great spiritual victories in comparison to others. But he welcomed the man who prayed "God be merciful to me, a sinner" (Luke 18:13). Reject the temptation to pretend obedience. You can become the person God intended you to be. But pretending won't get you there.
